Time To Say Goodbye

It’s been an emotional fortnight in Teacup house.  After 8 wonderful years, my gorgeous boy finally left primary school.

To mark the occasion, there was a fabulous play, an emotional mass and a wonderful party. 

In short, his last week in school was special and memorable….exactly what it should be.

I knew that I would feel emotional about this huge milestone but I wasn’t quite prepared as to quite how much.

Most of the friends I have in our area have been forged through the school.  In fact, I hardly knew anyone until I had my boy.

When he first started nursery school all those years ago, he was a scared little boy clinging to his mummy and crying every single morning I left him.  

I was an unsure, young mum fumbling my way through motherhood.

Luckily it didn’t take long for us both to find our feet.  Over the years Seb has forged some great friendships and I have built up a network of wonderful mums and dads that I am proud to also call my friends.  

However, in September the children will part ways and go to a selection of different schools in the local area.  I’m going to miss our lovely little school community and it’s safe to say that our lives are going to change dramatically.

There will be no more mad-dash school runs.  No assemblies or concerts and certainly no egg and spoon race at sports day.

There will be no standing on the playground chatting to the other mums while I wait to see my son and his friends spill out of class, smiling and exhausted after a busy day, sharing in the highs and lows of school life.

We must say goodbye to all of this.

But……I’m not very good at saying goodbye or closing doors.

My big heart struggles to move on easily.

I have watched my son grow up alongside a group of children that have become his friends and so I have great affection for them now too.

I have stumbled my way along the crazy, scary, bumpy road of parenting with all their mums and dads, sometimes laughing, sometimes crying, mostly making it up along the way and supporting each other through it all.

My heart and mind are literally full to the brim with monumental moments and precious memories from this time in our lives and I feel sad to be leaving them behind.

I want to relish them, hear them and see them all over again.

When I began this journey, I was a lonely single parent after my first failed marriage.  I am leaving as a single parent with another failed marriage behind me….but certainly not a lonely one.

These lovely people have always been there through my ups and downs with open arms, a listening ear and glass of wine.

And when my hair fell out and I started to wear wigs, they were supportive, funny and protective.

I will miss their warmth, their kindness and seeing their cheery smiles on the playground every day.

Of course, there is something else I shall miss probably above everything else…..which is the intense involvement in my son’s life.

As a parent, primary school gives you presence and purpose.  I have played an active role in my son’s primary school life, never missing an assembly, concert or sports day.

I have watched his beaming face come first over a finish line, listened to him singing his little heart out and been there on the playground with a cuddle after a bad day.

I have been there through it all, a proud, happy, tired, purposeful mummy……and now…..I must take a step back.

I must let my son become independent and find his own way at high school.  I must let him go (just a little) so he can flourish and grow into the young man he’s on his way to becoming.

It will certainly take time to adjust to the change…..but I know I’ll be ok, I always am.

Live moves on; as one door closes,  another always opens with the promise of new experiences and adventures.

It’s time to say goodbye and allow that beautiful door to gently close, knowing it shall leave a magical, colourful imprint on our lives forever.

 

 

1 Comment

  1. Anonymous
    31st July 2017 / 1:50 pm

    Lovely words from a lovely lady……..

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