The Life I Should Be Living

It is Saturday morning and I’ve been awake since before six.  I decided to get up and work for a few hours before Seb wakes up to get ahead for the day.

I came downstairs and opened the curtains, popped the kettle on and smiled a big smile, as I have done every day for the last week because….we are in our new house!!

After five months of difficulties, it seemed like it was never going to happen, so to finally be here feels AMAZING.

It’s not perfect by a stretch, in fact there is lots of work to do. 

Seb and I are still sharing a room at the moment while his is renovated. The boiler isn’t working so there is no hot water or heating, the cellar is full of rubbish left by old tenants that needs moving….BUT it’s ours and I LOVE it.

It’s a two bed period terrace.  The downstairs is open plan which is perfect for all the entertaining I like to do. The bedrooms and bathroom are great sizes and there’s a cellar ripe for conversion one day. There is a perfect outside area for sitting out and drinking wine in the summer.

It’s in a lovely area, close to all the local shops, bars and eateries but most importantly, close to lots of our friends too.

Renovation work is already underway and I’m eager and excited to turn this little house into a wonderful home where happiness, love and positivity rule.


Since selling my old house, I was worried whether I’d get back on the property ladder as house prices had increased so much.  Having a place to call home has always been hugely important to me so it feels as though a giant weight has been lifted.

Plus, my divorce is underway and in a couple of months, I’ll be legally single again.  The marriage felt wrong from the beginning, so I’ll be relieved to finally close the door on that turbulent, stressful chapter of my life.

I feel like I’ve been set free.

I’m in control of my life again and free to make the decisions that I know are right for me and my boy…..and we are both happier and more relaxed as a result. 

We recently found out that he has a place at a fab high school for September that’s just been announced as being in the top 5% in the country, so we’re over the moon and excited for that new adventure.

In other news, my little doodle business is doing well.  It’s making me feel creatively content in a way I haven’t felt for years and provides a sense of achievement that I’ve been craving for some time but couldn’t quite find.

I’m feeling healthier and calmer too.  I’m taking care of myself ; eating well, going to the gym and….despite the craziness of moving house, I’m not feeling that awful stress and anxiety anymore. 

I’ve also noticed some of my hair growing back which is definitely a sign that my body is finally healing from the inside.

When I look back now, I can’t believe that I allowed myself to stay in a situation that was making me so ill, for so long.  

I’m not being hard on myself though or wasting  time looking back and pondering my mistakes. firmly believe that everything happens for a reason; to either teach us a lesson or remind us of the life we should be living.

And I’m pretty sure that for me….that life is only just beginning.

Love Toria 







  1. 18th March 2017 / 8:06 am

    Congratulations Tor. I had been wondering when you might be moving in. Also you and Seb must be thrilled at his place for high school. So glad things are going well for you xx

    • 18th March 2017 / 9:05 am

      Thanks Cath, we are over the moon. It’s a lovely fresh start xx

  2. 18th March 2017 / 8:13 am

    Wishing you all the best of luck in your new house and embracing the new chapter in your very exciting happy life. So very deserved x

    • 18th March 2017 / 9:06 am

      Aw thank you Beth! It does feel exciting. xx

  3. 18th March 2017 / 9:04 am

    I’m so god damn bloody happy for you both. You totally deserve this sweet xx

    • 18th March 2017 / 9:08 am

      Aw thanks babe, it’s been a long time coming but finally arrived. Loving every minute. xx

  4. thegermanwife
    18th March 2017 / 9:13 am

    congratulations I am so happy that you and Seb are finally in your very own home and a exiting new chapter awaits! brilliant news about his new school too! I am wishing you all the best! xx

    • 18th March 2017 / 10:18 am

      Thanks AJ! We’ve been on this journey together. I hope you guys are happily in your new home very soon too! Keep me posted. xx

  5. 18th March 2017 / 4:38 pm

    Tor, this is brilliant news and I am so pleased for you. The house looks and sounds lovely and it’s great that the doodle business is going by well. Things are looking up. Pen x.

    • 6th April 2017 / 10:00 am

      Thanks lovely, life is definitely on the up. It feels full of fun and hope again. xx

  6. 19th March 2017 / 8:39 pm

    Lovely to read thisTor. So happy for you. Wishing you lots of wonderful times in your new home x

  7. 26th April 2017 / 12:06 am

    Oh Tori you did it! What amazing news. So happy for you and your gorgeous son and wow the school news! How fab is that? xxx

    • 27th April 2017 / 11:22 am

      Thank you gorgeous lady, that’s so kind and I was thrilled to be included in your blog stars round up. Thank you so much. Hope life is treating you well. xxx

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