Looking Forward

If I’m honest, life lately has been rather difficult.  January started with my usual ‘new year zestiness’ and looking forward to my new home. 

I was meeting contractors and discussing completion dates, when all of sudden, we hit a problem……a very large problem.

My solicitor called me a couple of weeks ago, with the news that my land search had revealed that the lovely, long, south-facing garden I’d fallen in love with…did not belong to the property. 

The garden is in fact owned by a company who also own three of my neighbours’ gardens.  I’ve been informed that the owners of the land submitted a proposal to build shops on the patch of land over ten years ago, but all the local residents opposed and the plans were rejected.

I was devastated when I found out the news.  I had set my heart on the house and there are very few properties available in our area at the moment.

I felt really deflated and upset for a few days. My anxiety and stress appeared and I couldn’t sleep.  It felt like life just kept throwing obstacles in my way.

After heated discussions with all parties and debates on social media, I decided on Monday to proceed with the sale.  I love the house, the neighbours are friendly and it’s in a great area.  It ticks so many of our boxes.

I’ve spoken to many of the neighbours who don’t appear in the slightest bit concerned about the issue.  Apparently once the plans were rejected, the company wrote to all the residents and gave them the opportunity to purchase the land so I’m hoping this is still an option now.  I have made enquiries with the investment management company who I’m hoping can contact the owners to find out.

So at this present moment, I am sealing an envelope containing the signed contracts to my new house.  I’ll be posting it off today and hopefully completing next week….if all goes to plan.  Then it will be action stations, trying to get the house ready to move into.

My first job is to make the house warm and dry.  I’ll be getting the roof fixed and insulated and also insulating the two exterior walls.  I want the house to be toasty warm and to minimise damp caused by condensation, which was a problem in my old house that I want to avoid this time around. 

A new boiler will also ensure it’s warm and energy-efficient which is going to be important now I’m paying bills on my own again.  I’m looking forward to the renovation and sharing all my ideas and progress with you.

A tiny part of me is nervous to be going it alone again, without the back-up of a partner.  It’s easy to get used to having the support of another person.  After years of being independent, I had slipped into an easy dependency but…..I’ve done it before and I know I’ll do it again.

I think what I’m looking forward to most, is living a more peaceful life, without a sense of constant opposition or disapproval.

I’m dreaming of quiet weekend mornings listening to music, reading and cooking breakfast.  Having friends and family over to stay or for dinner, which I haven’t really been able to do for so long.

I’m looking forward to getting my boy settled in a new bedroom and watching him relax and find proper peace again.  I’m hoping the night-time anxieties that appeared during my relationship, will gently subside and my confident little sleeper will return.

I’m looking forward to summer evenings sat out in the garden (which may or may not become mine) with a glass of wine, listening to the world go by.

I’m just looking forward……and that feels good right now.







  1. RaisieBay
    26th January 2017 / 12:21 pm

    It’s always good to look forward, I hope it all works out fine for you x

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